Friday, November 6, 2009

The Murder Story

Murder. It is such a harsh word. Especially considering the fact that I am only talking about plants here. And I suppose if I were to stand trial on behalf of all of the vegetation that has resided--however temporarily--in and around my house over the years, I would be found guilty only of involuntary, uh, plant-slaughter.

Yes, I have a black thumb. Don't believe me? This is one of my current houseplants:


And this is the only kind of plant I've been able to sustain for any length of time:

And to show you my depth of botanical knowledge, I have no idea what this vine is called; I simply refer to it as "that plant, you know, the kind you can't kill." And you really can't. It can be all brown and shrively for a week and perk up in minutes with a mere sprinkling of moisture. Yes, it's my kind of plant.

So, knowing my sordid past with plants, one might ask why I am planning to plant a garden this spring. Because I am. I've always wanted a garden. I think it would be nice to be able to provide my own food. Like in the olden days. Like Half-Pint and her family did. Plus, I think it would be a good learning experience for the kids.

I'm going to hopefully make this whole Gardening Thing easier for me because I am going to go the way of Square Foot Gardening. Reading about this method is so exciting because it actually sounds fun!

I'm going to start small: one 4x4 for herbs and then maybe another 4x4 or a 3x3 to experiment with some veggies. I also would like to reserve a square foot for each child. That's one thing that's great about Square Foot Gardening: it's perfect for Control Freaks like me. If the kids have their own square foot, I will be far less likely to fret over it.

So I'm really looking forward to spring. Before then, I will probably start some of my seeds indoors. And in the meantime, I'm reading and researching, researching and reading. I am bound and determined to turn my black thumb into green, resulting in a little less, uh, murder around here!

16 comments:

Teacher Mommy said...

Heh. Yeah, I'm very practiced in that kind of murder. I've even managed to kill cacti.

I'm trying very hard to keep the cyclamen Joe gave me alive. Crap. That reminds me.

Gotta go get some water...

Arby said...

Fish emulsion. The smell is just this side of horrible, but the results are fantastic! Feed some to your plants and even you won't be able to kill them.

Kathleen said...

Arby, From your description, my guess is that fish emulsion is not optimal for house plants?? And where do I get the stuff? Is it bottled? Bagged? Straight from the fish? What is it anyway? Fish juice?

sharon said...

Pothos, it's called a Pothos.

Mrs Soup said...

Good luck!! I hope your garden works....I may have my husband start one too. So I don't kill it.

audrey @ the lewis 4 said...

Your title was so....Dramatic. :)

You're my kinda girl. I totally kill all plants, too. I want to grow my own veggies but I just. can't. I don't have enough faith in myself.

dclouser said...

You are the ultimate planner-aheader! My goodness, fall has barely begun and you are planning for spring. The garden sounds like a great idea - there's no way you'll forget to tend it because you'll have 4 young ones reminding you!

Bernie said...

This is how I feel about my mums! I keep killing them. I laughed so hard at this post. Thanks for sharing.

Warmly,

Bernie

Amy said...

You and I have so much in common! I, too, have a black thumb and have also been thinking about doing the square foot gardening next spring. A friend of mine did that last spring and it does look like fun. And manageable. Can't wait to hear all you learn!

Cynthia@RunningWithLetters said...

I had to laugh...I had a post eerily similar to this in early October. I don't have the best track record with indoor plants, but I must say, I grow a killer garden (I just now realized the punny nature of that phrasing, considering the tile of your post LOL). Lots of herbs, tomatoes, and peppers...so I'd say you've got a decent chance of making a good go of this garden thing! Can't wait to hear about the results!

Linda said...

Oh, just read my blog and you know I'm not one for advice.
I will say that Arby is correct; my mom put it on house plants ONCE and we almost had to move, but it sure made the plants grow! My dad, Cherokee that he was, put it in the garden and it helped there too. then again, he tried everything.....

CrossView said...

I actually have better luck with outside gardening than I ever did with houseplants. I even once killed a "closet plant" that is supposedly unkillable. Yeah, it was a an ugly death.

And herbs are a good start. I can grow those!

Cynthia@RunningWithLetters said...

Hey, Kathleen--stop on by my place for a little bloggy love :)

CrossView said...

You actually won a "Redneck Romance" package. LOL! Please e-mail me at homeskooler at gmail . com (or Facebook) with your address.

tennisisformoms said...

Kathleen,
I once made leaves fall off a fake houseplant. Talk about plant-slaughter!

I tried seeds inside this year for a square foot garden. Trust me....buy the young plants at Lowe's once they're on the shelves. Trust me. It'll save ya many gray hairs and keep your kids from hearing a few new curse words!! Buy the plants!!!!

Amy @ Cheeky Cocoa Beans said...

Good for you! :) I, too, was/am horrible with plants. I finally have a few that I haven't killed in, oh, 4-5 years or so. Whoo hoo!! African violets turned out to be good for me--I feared for their lives when my son's Sunday School teacher sent them home with him for a Mother's Day gift. They turn brown if you water them while they are in sunlight, but I tend to water everything at night (read: after the kids have gone to bed and it's QUIET enough where I actually might think about those silent little plants). I have two potted impatiens that the boys brought home from VBS years ago that have managed to survive...they shrivel up from neglect and then spring back to life after I (finally) water them.