Friday, January 15, 2010

The Nazi Pool

I homeschool, but my kids are very socialized. I, on the other hand, do not always feel so socialized. Especially at the end of weeks where TravelDaddy has been absent and my only adult interaction has been Facebook. So, in order to get some socialization, I grudgingly signed up for the swim day at the local aquatic center.

If you know me well, you may understand why I did so grudgingly. You see, even in the summer, I like my pool water to feel like pee. 87-90 degrees is perfect for pool water. Even on a balmy July afternoon. Unfortunately, I have encountered very few who share my enthusiasm for tepid water. That is why when someone says their pool is heated, I remain a little skeptical.

Going swimming in January wouldn't be a problem for me with regard to my three swimmers. All I have to do is be physically present poolside as their Guardian. But the little one, well, she presents a problem. I thought about bringing a big bag of candy and bribing her to sit on the side of the pool with me while the others splashed and frolicked and played in the water and I sat and gabbed with the grown-ups. But that would have been very Bad Mommy of me.

So I grudgingly--again--put on my swimsuit. Good thing because when I registered, the lady asked me if I had my suit on. I replied in the affirmative.

"May I see it?" she asked.

"Excuse me?" I replied.

"May I see it?" she pushed.

"Uuumm. OK," I said as I pulled up my sweater and my shirt to reveal the suit. Do I win the Miss America crown now? I suppose they want to make sure moms are not just, uh, coming to the pool to socialize (who would do that anyway?); however, they do have lifeguards present, plus if my kid was drowning, I wouldn't stand on the side of the pool complaining that I couldn't save my kid because I'm not properly garbed.

That wasn't the only annoying thing that happened when I signed in. I live about 15 minutes from the aquatic center. The center itself is part of a park which belongs to the county, not my county but a neighboring one. After asking me to model my swimsuit, she asked to see my driver's license. I wanted to remind her that my family and I simply want to swim, not adopt a child, but I remembered my manners in the presence of my children and showed her my license. Turns out she was just searching for my hometown so she could know that I am not a resident of the center's county. Which means I got the privelege of paying DOUBLE! So instead of $20 I had to pay $40. With four very expectant children standing beside me gawking excitedly at the huge slide on the other side of the glass wall, I wasn't going to turn around and go home. I forked over the cash.

And once inside it was nicely warm. My three older ones had a blast. My youngest not so much. Part of the problem was that she had to wear an obnoxious lifevest. I had her normal wings on but was kindly informed by one of the lifeguards that those were not permitted. Why was I not surprised?

I waded in with her for a few minutes before she informed me she was done. One thing I had anticipated was that there would be no food or drink inside. I was surprised then to see a picnic area with vending machines. Of course the Princess was hungry after her brief moments in the pool, but all I had was a $5. I asked my friends if they had change. When none of them did, I announced that I was going to go up front to ask for some change. After all, I paid them a small fortune for a couple hours in their pool; a handful of quarters was the least they could do. That's when my friend pointed to the sign on the vending machine. We are unable to provide change at the front desk. Again, why was I not surprised ?



10 comments:

Unknown said...

Rude, rude,rude! Isn't it law that you can only be harassed on Wednesday's? Good thing tomorrow's Sunday! :)

Unknown said...

$40? That's unbelievable. They sure know how to rip you out of Cash!
Glad you guys had a good time...:)

CrossView said...

That took me back! Growing up we always went to the base pools. And they had LOTS of rules. Including having to shower before we could get in and even swim caps. Ok, so that shows that it's been a long time since I was a kid. =P

Looks like the oldest three had a great time, so you get the "good mommy" award! ;o)

I hope you stayed a LONG time for that entrance fee...

Anonymous said...

Yikes!! I went to one of those county pools earlier this school year and had to pay just to SIT in the bleachers. When my two started to protest because there weren't very many kids swimming (we were there for a 'meeting'), I smiled big and told them to GET IN THE WATER!! :o) They swim 3-4 times a week for swim team, so they weren't very enthused about this 'meeting,' but after I had to fork over money to SIT in the bleachers, they were going to GET IN THE WATER!! Whew. Fun times....

Love those Nazi-run pools....

@nnie said...

funny story... i can relate because I like my pool water like pee too. And I would have choked on my spit when they doubled dthe price, yikes! We have a library near us that has lots and lots of rules and they are never very nice and I think of them as the library nazis myself! I guess Seinfeld really made that idea popular... and funny too. I say you get the "good mommy" award. Did they make you swim?

tsinclair said...

I am really sorry you had to pay double (and glad they did not ask for my i.d.) - I am also very glad you came though.
Your camera takes much better pictures than mine, I have to get a new one...one day that is.

ballast photography said...

1) I couldn't agree more about the water temp issue.

2) We have entire water parks here in VA that are cheaper than your aquatic center. Unbelievable!!!

3) I have been a terrible blogger and follower. I've pretty much determined that my brief tenure as a daily blogger is over.

Holly said...

I've run into that at almost every public swimming pool we've ever been to. It's extremely annoying. Wow on the 40 dollars-that's terrible! I guess they're not into repeat customers, eh? Glad the kids had fun, though. Holly

Unknown said...

I checked - your pee temp is slightly off. Yes, I checked. About 10 yrs ago I had a bright idea of starting an Internet company selling clean pee. The idea died in committee.

Then I was going to start a gourmet dog treat co. over the Internet but the "committee" once again killed my idea because he didn't think my company name was that great. You'll have to just ask...

just because your pee temp was to low.

sanjeet said...

They sure know how to rip you out of Cash!
Glad you guys had a good time...:)

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