Monday, March 1, 2010

Note to Self: Baking Edition

Dear Self,

Next time you have a cold and a sharp craving for chocolate chip cookies smacks your taste buds, do not make them yourself. Because after the cookie dough is complete and you begin shoveling it in your mouth take a little taste-testing nibble, it will taste very bitter.

This will cause a chain reaction of events:

First, you will check the recipe, which will do you no good because you know as well as I that amidst the Chaos that is your domain you're not really paying any attention to what you're doing. Therefore, reviewing the recipe will just be like looking at it for the first time.

Next, you will retrieve all of the soiled measuring cups from the depths of the Pit of the Kitchen Sink to confirm that teaspoons are teaspoons and tablespoons are tablespoons, though for all you know since both are out, you could have used the tablespoon for salt after all.

After this check, you will begin to feel guilty remembering that not too long ago, you were lecturing a certain young lady about double-checking measuring spoons and recipes for capital and lowercase T/ts and what if you are the one who totally messed it up this time?

Just in case you might have made such an error, you start dumping in more sugar, you know, to counteract any extra salt that may be lurking in the mush.

But it still tastes so bitter.

Finally, once you have determined you must have done it all right because, really, how hard is it to follow a recipe, especially one you've made 2 million 345 thousand 602 times and therefore should have it memorized by now, although it's a grand thing that you didn't try to do it from memory, you resort to asking a not so little little person to taste test for you. She tastes it and exclaims, "Wow! That is REALLY sweet!"

You ask, "It's not bitter?"

"No," she emphasizes, "it's REALLY, REALLY sweet!"

So, in conclusion, Self, next time just resist the craving and have some carrots let the not so little little person do the baking.

6 comments:

Mandee said...

Ha ha! Sorry your cookies didn't turn out, but it makes for a funny story. Hope you get to feeling better!

ballast photography said...

For 13 years, I made the exact same brownie recipe nearly every week for my girls' Bible study group. You would think that, say, by year 2 maybe I wouldn't need the recipe anymore--especially since I began making the brownies even before that, in high school. You'd also think--especially considering that I had the recipe right in front of me--that I wouldn't make any mistakes. But I did. So often that it became a running joke--what would happen this week? Too much sugar? Forgot the butter? Undercooked? Burned? The beauty of it is that I had enough good batches that the brownies still manage to live in infamy.

CrossView said...

Yup, a cold will make everything taste bitter/tinny. I laugh at you. It sounds exactly like something I'd do.

Hope you're feeling better soon. And then you can really apreciate some cookies! ;o)

Unknown said...

Hmmm...bitter...too much baking powder?

CrossView said...

*sigh* apPreciate

Bunch of Barrons said...

haha...too funny. My mom made cookies one time, and forgot to add the eggs. That was a batch for the trash can. :)