A Letter to Al Gore

Dear Mr. Gore,

I went showerless this morning. Not because I pressed Snooze one too many times, but rather, because the distance across the tile floor from the clothes hamper to the shower was too cold to cross in my birthday suit; the shower had to wait until this afternoon when a half hour on the treadmill warmed me up enough to make that trek across the bathroom tolerable. It has been in the 20s and 30s here. This morning it was 17 degrees. Have I told you I live in Georgia? That's the state that touches the southeast corner of your home state in case you don't know.

What can I do to usher in some of that global warming about which you propagandize on a regular basis? I already own an SUV. Do I need to drive it more? Or faster? Faster means more gas consumption, right? Or maybe I should just let some of the air out of the tires? Please. I will do anything.

I will fly more.
I will use styrofoam plates and bowls and cups.
And then throw them to this frigid wind as litter.
I will cut down all the trees within a mile radius of my home.
I will purchase a cow and feed it Beef-a-Roni so it will be more flatulent.
Hey, I'll eat some Beef-a-Roni myself if that will help.

Please. I really need your help. If you have more information on how I personally can cause global warming, please send it to me. I need to take action before I am forced to move back to Africa. I may be forced to do that anyway; cows are cheaper there.

Freezing in Georgia,
Kathleen

Nuts

I'm a big Glenn Beck fan. Yeah, sometimes his Doom and Gloom unnecessarily feeds by tendencies towards worry, but I appreciate his humor, his parody, his honesty, and his curiosity.

If you haven't been following him, you have missed all of his investigations on the community organizing group ACORN. Apparently, it hasn't been lost on my 4-year-old, though (and don't worry--we turn off any inappropriate content):

Today I turned on Beck's show and Audrey said, "Hey, there's the guy who always talks about nuts!"

What the 4th Means to Me

I haven't always been a proud American. Growing up, America was a place I visited for a year's furlough. Aside from good-byes from my MK friends, furloughs weren't half bad. A furlough was a year's time to enjoy the conveniences of America, to indulge in McDonald's hamburgers and a plethora of other treat options. Of course, furlough also meant a new school, new people, and a different church almost every week. I enjoyed my time here, but I was always thrilled to be heading back "home".

I still miss Africa, but I have now spent as much of my life in America as in Africa, and, well, America feels like home now. Even as I've learned to call it home, I can't say I have passed all of my time on this side of the ocean with a great deal of patriotism. But my patriotism has certainly grown over the last several years.

I can point to one specific thing that caused an inner awareness about my apathy toward this country and the freedom and opportunity it offers. Shortly after the bombs began to drop in Afghanistan in 2001, I remember watching some sort of Presidential thing honoring soldiers. In it was a slideshow depicting soldiers saying goodbye to their families, the background music of "I'm already there" (Rascal Flatts maybe??) adding to the poignancy of the moment. With tears streaming down my cheeks, I remember experiencing that sudden epiphany: These soldiers are sacrificing potentially everything for MY country, for MY freedom. What an awesome call to service they have.

The 4th of July used to be, for me, just a merry day for fireworks and barbecues. I get it now, though. I get that I live in a great country, a country where I can worship as I want to worship and teach my children in the manner in which I want them taught. Those are freedoms which have come at a cost, and I am grateful for all of those who have paid that price.

Right now I have two friends in my thoughts and prayers whose husbands have been deployed. They are sacrificing too. I thank them from the bottom of my heart. I thank them for what they give up so that their husbands can serve this country. I thank my two friends for their act of service in that sacrifice.

As the celebrations wind down. As the last firecracker pops. As we go about our normal routine tomorrow, I hope we won't forget the freedoms we enjoy here and the people who offer their service for our independence.

Inaugural Thoughts

Yesterday when I turned on the TV and the kids saw Barack Obama taking the oath, Michael reacted with a loud, "Boooooo!" Knowing, shamefully, that his reaction was based purely on tidbits of opinion he has gleaned from his mom and dad's conversations over the past year or so, I paused the ceremony to discuss with the kids the respect we are to have for our country's leader. No matter who he is. No matter how much we disagree with him. God has placed this man in a huge position of authority, and we are to honor the position and the person in that position.

Our former president deserves our respect and honor as well, I think, now more than ever. I didn't agree with everything he did during his eight years, but I respect him deeply for the man he was. He stood by his principles no matter what the opinion polls showed. And the gracious respect he extended toward Obama during transition has been, even according to learned historians, unmatched in history. Did you know some past presidents refused to even talk to the incoming president? Then of course there was the Trash-the-White-House-Clinton transition in 2001. But George Bush? He treated Obama with decency and respect, and I think, in light of how Bush has been treated by the Democrats, this goes a long way to show you the kind of man he is. As I watched Bush deliver his witty, heart-felt, genuinely warm speech last night at his Welcome Home celebration in Texas, I had to admire the grace and dignity with which he left office. I hope his legacy will be wrapped in that same grace and dignity.

As for our new president, I hope that despite all of the strong opinions my children have heard my husband and me issue, we will be successful in teaching them that we must support our leaders. I know I will support President Obama...and with much more respect and honor than was extended to our former president by those on the "other" side.

Field Trippin'

Our school day today was turned upside down by a mid-day realtor caravan. I spent this morning cleaning up the messes that occurred between the time the maid left yesterday and the very moment the Princess just exited the room leaving her Trail O' Stuff behind her. I thought I might be able to squeeze in some school after the cleaning, but then there was also the baking. I feel it necessary to stuff all of my guests full of baked goods. Of course, with these particular guests, the baked goods were merely a bribe nice gesture.

So no school as we headed out to lunch and to Wal-Mart to pick up goodies for our Operation Christmas Child shoeboxes. Never fails. Despite good intentions to get these done way beforehand and therefore make it a much less stressful experience for the kids and me, I ALWAYS leave this for the day before the boxes are due. (This procrastinating...it seems to be some kind of trend with me. *sigh*)

Running errands in the middle of a school day always makes me just a touch nervous, causing me to cast furtive glances around me, looking for the Truancy Police. At some point, at some cash register or restaurant table, I have someone ask me, "Oh, are the kids out of school today?" You can see them check their mental calendar for holidays. "No they don't go to school." I'd like to leave it at that, but being the responsible and somewhat paranoid person I am, I then dive into a huge explanation of homeschooling and why we are not at that very moment at home with our heads in a book. As if I need to give an explanation.

Anyway, today we were enjoying a peaceful lunch at Olive Garden when about 25 students and their teachers walked in. Now I have this gift of eavesdropping (can I call that a gift?). Drives my husband crazy. At the end of any meal, I can tell him the life story of the patrons seated next to us (I'm an observant people watcher too, so I can embellish fill in any missing details). So, by using my gift, I gathered that these children were on a field trip. This excursion included Target and, obviously, Olive Garden.

Target and Olive Garden? For a field trip? I pay taxes, not to help me purchase educational materials with which to teach my children, but to help finance field trips to Target and Olive Garden? Isn't that what moms and dads and weekends are for? For trips to Target and Olive Garden? I'm not sure I see the educational value in such an excursion. If there is good news here, however, it would be that I needn't have had my children participate in any schooling when we returned home this afternoon; I could have just counted Olive Garden and Wal-Mart as our school day.

Brer Palin

Inspired by a fabulous outing to the Center for Puppetry Arts where we enjoyed a production of Brer Rabbit and Friends...

So 'dere she was, Brer Palin, jes hoppin' clippity, clippity, clippity, clippity, on de way to a good ol' fashion barbecue. She lickin' her lips when she thinkin' 'bout that juicy moose meat. Den all a da sudden, she stop. "What's dat?" she say. For dere, sittin' by de road is a tar baby. Not jes any ordinary tar baby neither. 'Dis one dressed in a blue shirt wit white pants an' a little red hat sittin' 'top its head. 'De tar baby, he jes stares at Brer Palin, an' he say nothin'.

"Why you starin' at me?" she say.

The tar baby, he say nothin'.

So Brer Palin, she walks up to de tar baby. "If you don't say nothin'," she say, "I'm goin' to punch you one!"

The tar baby, he say nothin'. He jes sits an' stares at her wit his blank eyes.

So Brer Palin, she pulls back her arm far as she can, an' she lets it go. Blip! She punches dat tar baby, an' her han', it sticks fast. She get so mad, she pull back her other arm far as she can an' lets dat one go. Blip! It sticks fast. She get even madder an' start kickin' dat tar baby. Soon, both her legs all stuck up in de tar.

By an' by, who happens by but Brer 'Bama and Brer Biden. Dey all snickerin' and winkin'. "Looks like you a little stuck today," say Brer 'Bama.

"Yeah," say Brer Biden, "looks like we might hafta do you in!" Dey laugh and laugh.

Brer Palin looks at Brer 'Bama and Brer Biden. Brer 'Bama, he so cool, an' ever'body so fooled by his smooth talkin' and all his promises. Biden, he as slick as an oil spill off de coast of Alaska. "Please," she say, "you can take all my money an' give it to ever'body else, even if dey's not workin' hard as me. But please, please, please don't 'lect dat John McCain."

Brer 'Bama and Brer Biden, they jes look at each other an' get ta chucklin'. Den Brer Palin, she say, "You can make me pay more tax. You can stop dem fightin' army folks from protectin' us, an' you can even pal 'round wit some of dem terrists. Jes' please, please don't 'lect dat John McCain."

Brer 'Bama an' Brer Biden jes rollin' on de floor hollerin' and laughin'. Brer Palin say, "An' you can kill dose babies, learn anything you want to de kids in dey schools. Jes' please, please don't 'lect dat John McCain."

Den Brer 'Bama an' Brer Biden, dey looks at each other an' gets all biggity-like. Den Brer 'Bama, he say, "Brer Palin, we ain't gonna 'lect dat McCain fella." An' dey keeps on laughin' so hard dey don't even see Brer Palin wrastlin' wit de Tar Baby. She break one han' loose, den 'nother. Den she break her feet loose too.

She turn 'round an' takes off lickety-split, hollerin' over her shoulder, "You mighta fooled ever' body else, but you ain't fooled me. You're sho gonna see me agin in four years!"

It's going to be a terrifying an interesting 4 years, my friends!

A Note from the Author: I know Brer Palin, she ain't a brer, but I works wit what I got, folks!

Webkinz Results and...Looking for WVP's

My Friends,

Under Webkinz Election Code 793029-12-1, candidates are permitted to extend their campaigns for the following reason: If a candidate’s Campaign Manager seeks to put off today what he (or she) can do tomorrow, a campaign is permitted to file for an extension until such time as the Campaign Manager is able to “pull it together.”

So, let’s first cover the results of the WebkinzElection Primaries in case you hadn’t heard. For the Girlz Party, Eunice the Unicorn pulled off the win with a substantial percentage of the votes, and Snappy did the same for the Boyz Party. (Actual statistics may, at some future date, be uncovered on the desk of the Campaign Manager.)

Eunice and Snappy are both excited about their campaigns and what they feel they can bring to the world: change, hope, and straight talk. Or something like that. At this point in the campaign, these candidates need to find suitable running mates. And so the WVP vetting begins. If you know of any Webkinz who are qualified for, and wish to seek the office of, the Webkinz Vice Presidency, please forward his or her name to the Campaign Manager at mkpierce@bellsouth.net. Please include the following information:

Webkinz Name
Webkinz Party Affiliation (Boyz or Girlz). Please, no Independents.
A photo (This is optional; WVP candidates will be judged by the content of their character, not the texture of their fur.)
A short paragraph which explains why you should be WVP and how you will change the world.

Potential candidates must have their information to the illustrious Campaign Manager by Friday, November 14.

May the best critter win,
Campaign Manager

WebkinzElection Primaries

You may have already received an email from me, but if not...will you kindly help us out in our Webkinz mock elections (or at least let your children help us out)? We're only in the primary stage right now, so we will need your help later on as well to elect a president. For now, please help us weed out the lesser nominees! Below you will find a bit of information on each nominee. Hopefully, this will help you make your decision. Naturally, if you are a girl, you should select one of the nominees with the Girlz Party; and if you are a boy, please select a nominee who is with the Boyz Party (not sayin' which one is the donkey and which is the elephant--they're my children; I could never put the donkey on one of them!). Please leave your votes in the Comments or email them to me at mkpierce@bellsouth.net.

Voting ends on Monday, October 6!

Girlz Party Nominees

Eunice - A unicorn whose favorite food is a lollipop, Eunice is ready to lead as President! A former Vice President of the Girls' Club, Eunice led with honesty and integrity. When not working hard, Eunice may be found playing on the playground with her alley cat friend Tina.

Goldie - A fan-tail goldfish, it's no surprise Goldie loves swimming. What may be a little known fact, however, is that her favorite food is chocolate cake. Goldie's past experience as the head of the Girls' Club highlights her abilities as a leader. "I've always wanted to be the president!" exclaims Goldie enthusiastically. Goldie also enjoys carrying other peoples' groceries. Her associate, a Magical Retriever, concurs that Goldie's energy and leadership qualities make her an excellent candidate.

Boyz Party Nominees

Snappy - Near a lake in the summer? Snappy loves to swim in it! Near a lake in the winter? Snappy likes nothing better than to slide on his back on the ice. Always generous, Snappy gives food or water from inside his shell to hungry or thirsty people. Snappy loves to cook and eat, and his personal favorite is a pie shaped like a turtle shell!

Spooky - Running on the slogan WaHaHaHa, Spooky is a bat who loves to travel, loves pretzels, and loves to tell jokes. In addition, he enjoys trick or treating and is the head of the Trick or Treating Club. This year on Halloween, he says, "I'm going to be a bat...'cause I am one!" Interestingly, he has always wanted a gumball machine--perhaps to hold the gumballs he will get on Halloween night.

Homeschool ESOL

Recently, Denver decided to do a little affirmative action in the gifted program of their public schools. You can read about it here. Read the article for yourself, but may I just point out that essentially, they are turning their gifted program into an ESOL program. Brilliant, Colorado! Maybe we'll consider moving to the Centennial State because my highest aspiration is to have my students--gifted or not--learn English as a second language. Actually, with my training and experience in an ESL class years ago, I really could just turn our homeschool into the Pierce Academy for English as a Second Language. Please don't get me wrong: I love diversity. I even enjoyed teaching ESL. But, come on, let the kids who actually test gifted enjoy an environment where they can shine and where they do not have to waste educational time waiting for the language learning curve to catch up with their classmates!

And on other educational fronts--this one pertaining to homeschooling--please go to this website to sign a petition to depublish the recent California ruling that homeschooling is illegal and may only be an option to parents who are certified to teach. The California law is actually more specific in saying that the parent must be certified for the age/subject he/she is teaching. This means I wouldn't be eligible to teach my children until they are in middle school and then I could only teach them English. I suppose if I lived in Cali, I could set up a little tent in the schoolyard and have my children come out during their 4th period study hall so they could be learned in their readin' and writin'. I know the Golden State is a world away from us here in the south, but trends tend to start in California. Let's stop it before it spreads!