Dear Dr. Quack,
I have to be honest. The reason I put off coming to your office for so long after the pain in my neck began is because I know all of your tactics. As soon as a patient walks through your door, you chiropractors guilt her into coming in for treatment multiple times per week. And if the patient does not come in, you call to express your concern and ask her if you can schedule an appointment. If that does not get her back in, you send her a letter explaining how a lack of chiropractic care will make her health slowly deteriorate until, potentially, she could become debilitated permanently.
When I finally did come in to see you about the pain in my neck, I gave in and scheduled the daily adjustments and treatments. I was desperate, plus I knew I had a long drive in the car coming up. However, I'm not sure your treatment did anything that time would not have done without your aid. The pain is still there, though it is not as severe. Might I not be in this same condition if I had simply saved the couple hundred I spent in your office as well as the countless hours and stayed at home with my ice pack?
Of course, you also found an additional long-term problem unrelated to the pain in my neck. You told me my neck is losing its curve. Too much time on the computer, I'd wager. And I suspect everyone in my generation and those following will lose that natural curve as well.
Not that I don't care about the curvature of my neck, but my chiropractic health simply does not hold a place at the top of my priority list. My kids, their orthodontic bills, homeschool materials, vacations, car maintenance, food, shelter, this new puppy, Starbucks. Those are things that crowd my chiropractic health off the top.
So when you told me this afternoon that you needed to see me twice a week, and I told you that I might come in week after next, the fact that you said, "You're going to wait that long?" did not change my priorities. My kids, their orthodontic bills, homeschool materials, vacations, car maintenance, food, shelter, this new puppy, and Starbucks still come before visits to your office. Your rhetorical question only made me confirm in my head, I wish I had listened to my instincts and not started this nonsense in the first place.
I will continue to come see you but only because you have a massage therapist, and my insurance covers it. There's nothing like a $100 massage I only have to pay $20 for. The fact that my neck is straightening out? Well, I'll just add that to my list of Annoying Things That are Happening to Me as I Age. And, hey, maybe if my neck gets straighter, I'll get taller instead of shrinking.
Not giving in to the guilt,
Kathleen
Showing posts with label Dr. Quack. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dr. Quack. Show all posts
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
A Pain in the Neck
Yeah, I know. It's been awhile. I have a valid excuse. A week and a half ago, I woke up with a crick in my neck. It got progressively worse and as is my usual fashion, I procrastinated on calling Dr. Quack. I finally called and have been receiving daily [expensive] treatment since.
One thing I know for certain: my pain in the neck is at least partially punishment for all of the precious hours I waste on the likes of Facebook and Blogger. There is, at this point, no comfortable way for me to access this evil machine. As I write, I am sitting on my favorite recliner, ice pack on my shoulder, rolled up blanket behind my neck, and my computer on top of my lap desk which is balanced on a pillow on my lap. And did I mention that after I finally got sort of comfortable in this position, the phone rang? Yeah, forgot the phone. I yelled to the kids to answer it, but they got to it too late. Not a big deal. Just annoying.
This morning I actually woke up feeling not quite so bad. At least the pain of having been frozen in the same position all night did not cause me excruciating pain when I tried to delicately roll out of bed. And when I say roll, I mean that literally. However, as is my usual fashion, I took my feeling better to mean that I should DO Things. Like vacuum. Oh, and move a desk.
You see, I really want a desk in the family room. I realize a desk will not look that great in our already crowded family rom, but it is for Functionality's Sake. Unfortunately, my dear husband has not seen my vision and thus has not moved my desk into the family room. In cases such as these, I take it upon myself to move the furniture where I want it in order to surprise him when he gets home: "Surprise! The table you didn't want in the middle of the living room is now there. But doesn't it look much more lovely than you ever imagined?"
I had the boys, for the most part, move the desk according to my direction. But then of course there are other things that need to be moved. The desk was the Princess's art table in her room, so I had to move a table from upstairs into its space. But there was the crabs' terrarium on top of the table, so that had to be moved as well. I suppose in retropect, this was not as urgent of a project as I deemed, and it could well have waited until a later date when my neck is healed.
Waiting would go against my usual fashion, though.
One thing I know for certain: my pain in the neck is at least partially punishment for all of the precious hours I waste on the likes of Facebook and Blogger. There is, at this point, no comfortable way for me to access this evil machine. As I write, I am sitting on my favorite recliner, ice pack on my shoulder, rolled up blanket behind my neck, and my computer on top of my lap desk which is balanced on a pillow on my lap. And did I mention that after I finally got sort of comfortable in this position, the phone rang? Yeah, forgot the phone. I yelled to the kids to answer it, but they got to it too late. Not a big deal. Just annoying.
This morning I actually woke up feeling not quite so bad. At least the pain of having been frozen in the same position all night did not cause me excruciating pain when I tried to delicately roll out of bed. And when I say roll, I mean that literally. However, as is my usual fashion, I took my feeling better to mean that I should DO Things. Like vacuum. Oh, and move a desk.
You see, I really want a desk in the family room. I realize a desk will not look that great in our already crowded family rom, but it is for Functionality's Sake. Unfortunately, my dear husband has not seen my vision and thus has not moved my desk into the family room. In cases such as these, I take it upon myself to move the furniture where I want it in order to surprise him when he gets home: "Surprise! The table you didn't want in the middle of the living room is now there. But doesn't it look much more lovely than you ever imagined?"
I had the boys, for the most part, move the desk according to my direction. But then of course there are other things that need to be moved. The desk was the Princess's art table in her room, so I had to move a table from upstairs into its space. But there was the crabs' terrarium on top of the table, so that had to be moved as well. I suppose in retropect, this was not as urgent of a project as I deemed, and it could well have waited until a later date when my neck is healed.
Waiting would go against my usual fashion, though.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Our Lucky Day
I've noticed it every time I've visited Kohl's. Sitting there near the aisle. And every time I visit Kohl's, I try it out for a couple of hours minutes. It's the Homedics Shiatsu Massage Cushion. I think it is the heated one I've tried out several hundred times. Priced at $250. Too much to pay in my opinion.
But lately my back has been in an especially bad way. So bad, in fact, that I paid a visit toDr. Quack the chiropractor this morning. He said my pelvis is a little off, hence the reason my whole right side hurts like crazy and keeps me up at night.
When I got back from the chiropractor, Mark was on his way out to Kohl's to return a duplicate video game and to perhaps spend the Kohl's cash we earned when we did our Christmas shopping.
"Couldn't you just take a look at the shiatsu thingy? Pleeeease? Maybe it's on major sale, and you can pick it up for me for a hundred or something."
He said he'd look.
He called me about 15 minutes later to inform me that he could not find the cushion. Anywhere.
"Can't you ask someone if they have one in the back? Pleeeeease?" I pleaded. I had my doubts. When do they ever find things in The Back?
When he came home with the Homedics Shiatsu Massage Cushion in hand, I was surprised. He told me to try it out. I did, basking in the therapy, yet at the same time trying not to get too attached to the cushion should we need to return it to help our bank account. I was especially nervous when Mark asked me, "So how much do you like it? How much is it worth to you?"
"Ummm...a hundred? Please tell me you only paid a hundred. Or maybe $150?"
"No."
Gulp.
"It was free," he said.
Turns out he did indeed ask someone if there was one in the back. This employee disappeared for a few minutes and came back with one. It appeared to be an open box, and it wasn't the heated cushion I had tried before, but if I need heat--which I never use anyway--we have a heating pad.
"It's your lucky day," she said. "You can have this one for $26.99." Mark paid with our $30 Kohl's cash.
Guess it was our lucky day. Either that, or God really does care about the little things. Like aching backs.
But lately my back has been in an especially bad way. So bad, in fact, that I paid a visit to
When I got back from the chiropractor, Mark was on his way out to Kohl's to return a duplicate video game and to perhaps spend the Kohl's cash we earned when we did our Christmas shopping.
"Couldn't you just take a look at the shiatsu thingy? Pleeeease? Maybe it's on major sale, and you can pick it up for me for a hundred or something."
He said he'd look.
He called me about 15 minutes later to inform me that he could not find the cushion. Anywhere.
"Can't you ask someone if they have one in the back? Pleeeeease?" I pleaded. I had my doubts. When do they ever find things in The Back?
When he came home with the Homedics Shiatsu Massage Cushion in hand, I was surprised. He told me to try it out. I did, basking in the therapy, yet at the same time trying not to get too attached to the cushion should we need to return it to help our bank account. I was especially nervous when Mark asked me, "So how much do you like it? How much is it worth to you?"
"Ummm...a hundred? Please tell me you only paid a hundred. Or maybe $150?"
"No."
Gulp.
"It was free," he said.
Turns out he did indeed ask someone if there was one in the back. This employee disappeared for a few minutes and came back with one. It appeared to be an open box, and it wasn't the heated cushion I had tried before, but if I need heat--which I never use anyway--we have a heating pad.
"It's your lucky day," she said. "You can have this one for $26.99." Mark paid with our $30 Kohl's cash.
Guess it was our lucky day. Either that, or God really does care about the little things. Like aching backs.
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